Yes problems are blessings. This is how we develop, grow, become smarter, wiser, more experienced and learn from them of course. Nevertheless we should always do everything possible to prevent problems from happening in the first place. It can directly contribute in our quality of our life. So the question is what can we do to prevent problems? And this is one of those conversations which I want to have with you. I want to address situation when you are dealing with other people, with your colleagues, friends, employees, etc.
A priceless lesson that i`ve learned over my lifetime is that whatever problems arise, it could be a character personality problem at the beginning of the work relationship or when you just start dealing with a new person, you just hire a person, you just start working. Something happens and then we make excuses; maybe it’s a personality problem, maybe there was a misunderstanding and I just need to provide information, maybe it’s the work environment, or something else had to be done but not finished or they didn’t mean to be rude.
What is our intuitive approach of this situation? The intuitive approach is usually - they did not know, they were too embarrassed to ask for help, they just started work, they are just not sure. The reality of this is I have yet to see when these type of fundamental problems were not a warning signs but because our intuition is to find these common excuses, we miss the bigger issues and they are very different from informational problems and trying to fix them usually ends up being a futile effort.
For example, a person made a mistake because they did not know, so you provide information but the real issue is not that they did not know but that they did not ask and that is the real issue and an alarm should be ringing in your mind. The intuitive approach is to try to fix it. Right? Just make sure the fix is addressing the core issue and not the surface issue.
Bottom line, in my lifetime, and i always share with my experience. I have yet to see a single example when you discover these personality flaws and they were able to be fixed because the fix was addressing just the surface without addressing the real core.
Personality is personality. No matter what it is and how it is. So what i'm saying at the end of the day is if you have an opportunity and especially in the business environment, work environment but certainly in personal environment. If you have an opportunity to stop the relationship with that point or at least be prepared for ongoing repeating set of problems of this nature - act because I am telling you that somebody who displays this type of fundamental issues - you can explain it to them over and over again. No matter how much time you will spend, how much effort you will put in teaching, explaining, explaining why it should not be done the core fundamental thing will not change.
So lets go back to the topic of preventing problems. If there is an opportunity i would just immediately, as soon as you see signs of it, if I have a choice, I would simply replace an individual or change the way and nature of tasks I let this person handle, whatever it is. And if it is personal relations - be prepared. If you would like to continue the relationship - just be ready and do not be surprised, do not be frustrated. You know our expectations are a big deal when ever we deal with any one on any level. You know if you set your expectations on a certain level, you always be frustrated, you always be depressed. You always be suffering.
Be ready when it happens at least to not get frustrated, do not be surprised. And wherever possible just address it in a way it makes sense under the circle but again be ready for repeating behavior..because I could guarantee to you in vast majority of cases that it is going to happen.